In tax delinquent real estate investing, creating rapport is the way to real estate riches. – Part 2 Post 22

Coach Mitch’s REFLECTIONS™

People deal with people they like

If I am accepted at the door, then I start the ‘warm-up’. I find things to talk about and I delve into the details. Often I try not to speak about their situation. I like to keep it light and try to give them power.

“This is a very nice home. It’s obvious that you take pride in being here. What improvements did you make?” This is where the rapport is starting to be built. I keep on going with gentle conversation until it feels like we are making a connection, having a chuckle, feeling looser – not happy, but a bit comfortable, viewed more like a potential friend.

Empathy will get information

When listening to their story, empathy and expressions of concern will get more details. Remember these details. They often are the key to overcoming objections.

“This whole business is terrible on my nerves.” they say. Consider this response, “Oh, that is so sad. It can’t be good to have this much pressure all the time. Your relationships are bound to suffer!” Now consider a second potential response, “It can’t be good for your marriage to have this much pressure?”

Do you feel the difference? The first response is a much better, stronger expression of concern while still putting out the expectation of an answer to knowing about a relationship that is suffering, like a marriage, but it is not obvious. The second response is more blatant, even intrusive. That cannot bring up good feelings.  You must be in tune and able to recognize the fine points of what will put someone on guard.

Question carefully

At the proper time, and only when I feel it is ready, do I start with the serious questions and even then, the empathy is ever present.

“I can arrange financing.” I say. This lets them think that I have money to lend. I then ask, “Is it OK for me to ask some personal questions?”

After all, they are thinking, it only makes sense that I need personal info if I’m considering lending to them, right? This sets them up mentally. They now allow themselves to give personal, private details about their life, to a perfect stranger, just as if I was Dear Abby or that person on an airplane that you tell everything.

I start by asking my favorite question, “What are you looking to accomplish?”

This is so direct a question that it takes them off-guard. Often, the first thing that they say is what they really want; this is their “hot button.” I listen to this very carefully. Later on, they will backtrack and try to ask for more, but in that unguarded moment, they revealed their bottom line position.

Rapport is a wonderful device, almost like a weapon; it is both a sword and a shield. This sounds almost cynical, like we are doing something to take advantage of a situation. Well, we are.

Used properly, rapport can open the door, so that you may be able to help a family in need.

Don’t forget, this family has known for a long time that it is facing a financial disaster and they have been in denial. You must do whatever you can to open up that situation. Don’t worry, people do not do anything that they do not want to do. You are simply the clever person that got them to see reality.

Every real estate investing guru says “Find the motivated sellers.” as if it is a magic potion. It is most important to understand, that once you have employed your good systems to find a motivated seller; that is just the beginning. What will you do then? Lasso and hog tie them? People work with those whom they like and trust. Getting a person in a desperate situation to like and trust you is a tall order but that is the winning ticket.

See Coach Mitch’s “Ridiculously Simple System…” ™ for details.

Put yourself in their shoes,